We’ve spent some time over the past 30 days revisiting thoughts on how to get back that loving feeling long after love’s first chemical attraction wanes. We’ve shared ideas on how to speak one another’s love language. We’ve talked about ‘CREEPING’ on one another … gigglin’ and wigglin’ … fostering the flirt … and the power of intentionality.
As we venture on our 30 days of reclaiming love’s euphoria and connecting as friends and lovers with our spouse, we thought we’d share, 5 Quick Tips for Successful Date Nights!
Find our readable version here:
5 Quick Tips for Successful Date Nights!
How do you capture that ‘first-time, date-night feeling’? How can you make it fun, protect your marriage connection, and keep you and your spouse healthier, happier, and more capable of managing life’s stressors?
Let’s dive in!
- Determine when you will calendar your connection. Ideally, we encourage couples to make it a weekly date. Decide together (a) the frequency of your dates. (b) The location of your dates. (c) And how much you will spend on your date. Sometimes budgets don’t always allow for an extravagant dinner. Consider renting a movie, popping popcorn, or packing a picnic.
The idea is to prioritize and make room for personal connection.
- Determine what you’ll talk about together. Each week let one person lead the conversation, ask questions, and plan the date. Ladies, arrange a MAN date for your guy. Gentlemen, prepare that special evening for your lady. Include the opportunity for a little one-on-one time to dream together.
- Determine to flirt a little and seek compatibility. How about playing a fun round of Simon says, adult married version? LOL. We shared a few weeks ago to begin flirting with your spouse, dressing to impress, and practicing an attitude of seeking common ground for compatibility and friendship. The truth is, the day to day grind can strip away our best intentions to connect. We want to connect, but then there’s the laundry. We want to laugh, but the kids need help with homework. Dating is the one time a week we say, “Enough is enough! I’m making you my #1 priority!”
- Determine to connect by sharing some ideal dates. Ladies, guys can’t read our minds. Guys, ladies may not think about shooting a game of pool or firing a gun at the local range, so take a moment to write out three ideas you each think would be fun and feasible to do on your date night. Sometimes finances call for even more creativity. We enjoyed some of our most enjoyable dates sitting by a body of water talking about the future and our dreams, or trying on Santa masks at the new outlet discount store, or dancing in the aisle at the local Dollar General. Reflect on some of your previous shared favorite dates. What made them so special? What was it about the date that caused such fond memories? Look for ways to implement those same qualities in future dates. Feel a little stuck. Here are a few to get you started:
- How about a TAPAS Date Night?
- Do a night of CHANCE. Draw your date out of a hat.
- Go, Bowling Or Play a game of pool.
- Go to a trampoline park like Flying Panda.
- Enjoy a walk and a Scenery Night.
- Try a date night to Grow Together- Attend a Conference Night.
- Go to a comedy Event.
- Live like a tourist and try something new locally. Groupon has great deals.
- Take a Road Trip and Explore a new area.
- Try Cookin’ & Kissin’ n the Kitchen. Make up your favorite recipe together.
- Finally, here are a few RULES to follow:
- Turn off cell phones.
- Determine your no conversation zones of topics you won’t talk about on your date.
- Minimize distractions (too noisy of an atmosphere, or tv screens everywhere)
- Be prepared. Create 2-3 fun or thoughtful questions or print off our conversation starters and have them ready and available in your car at all times.
- Plan but don’t over plan. Allow for spontaneity. And, remember, dates don’t exactly go as you intended.
- Be fun, friendly, and ready for an adventure.
- Be confident, considerate, and look for common ground.
- Speak life. Speak hope. Speak gratitude.
- Make it a practice to touch hands and sit close.
- Keep good eye contact and show sincere interest.
Nothing on earth is more important than the relationship of your marriage and family. We’d love to invite you to join us in a pursuit of living intentional to protect what matters the most. Learn more here. And be sure to let us know how we can pray for you.